We're kind of assholes, in case you didn't already know. Submit some shit!

Posts tagged solos


Feb 25, 2013
@ 12:18 pm
57 notes


The perfect singles portfolio follows a formula, right? Feature, news, spot news, portrait and sports action. We have some thoughts on that, and chances are, your current body of work looks like something as follows:

Photo of a candlelight vigil: Soft, flickering candlelight, people embracing in tears and high ISOs. You gotta ‘in’ that shit.

People freaking the fuck out at a sports event: Could be players, could be the spectators at the sidelines. Either way, their arms are up and their mouths are open. For some reason this type of photo is referred to as “jube” which sounds far too much like something sexual.

The kid feature: Truly the pinnacle of your abilities right here.

The Presidential photo: Oh hey, you photographed Barack Obama once? Cool story, bro.

The ‘artsy’ photos: You added some personal photos to your website to show how free-thinking and different you are from your colleagues. Everyone photographs their loved ones sitting/being blurry in cool light, but you were the only one with enough of an artist’s soul to dedicate your portfolio to it.

The spot news photo: Look! You made it to the scene in time to catch the last flame peter out! The composition sucks, the focus is off and there’s more noise than fire, but you’re damn proud to add this essential photo to the portfolio dreams are fucking made of.

A “fun-run” photo: Man, those are some sweet-ass, completely unique shots of people running through mud/throwing color/wearing zany and outrageous costumes! But guess what? Even your grandma made that lame photo, so get over yourself.

The portrait you’re really proud of lighting: Look ma! No window light!

The ‘layered’ photo: Yeah, keep trying.